Be All You Can Be -In Life
Written on June 21, 2011 by
As parents we set the ground work, we put in motion our blue print; it is what we perceive who our children should grow up and be. Now, I am not talking the part where we want the child to become a lawyer or a doctor (the next Miss America, an NFL great or President), I am talking about the kind of person they turn out to be. We are speaking not only about morals, respect and ethics; but it is what is in there heart, how they think and the choices they choose to make. You can try to instill what you wish, but when they become adults it is on them as to who they decide to be and how they conduct themselves.
When an adult child is an alcoholic or a drug addict, the first person we tend to see as to blame for this behavior is a parent of the kid. So what if one of the child’s parents was or is addicted to drugs or alcohol; most of the time, at some point it became the child’s choice to take on the road of self destruction they saw their parent on. Maybe the choice came after rehab the first time, but a choice comes into the picture, eventually. Yes, sometimes the cycle becomes impossible or time runs out before a change can take place; but not everyone is that unfortunate. Some have a lot more reasons, advantages and a support system -a basis to change or take a different road, than others do.
A child who lived through domestic violence or a dysfunctional family lifestyle does not have to choose to follow the same pattern when they have their own child(ren). They can choose to break the cycle, after all as a grown up it is our life, right? (You can’t tell me what to do anymore!) So even if the ground work sucked, you at some point have a choice. A choice to change. Some choose to be better parents then their own, and make it a reality for their children.
But what about the child who had nice parents that gave them a good foundation, morals, respect and ethics. You know the average child who did not have it all, but all was not bad. The child who as an adult is mean, selfish and demeaning. An individual that is verbally abusive, greedy and a user. Hard working parents who never took from nobody, and yet the child turns out to be the biggest user ever -family, friends, even a kind stranger becomes the next victim. Then they are the first to brag of there success or rub it in the face of those who have their footprints up and down there back. You know the type, one who speaks to their loved ones with such cruel words and call it criticism. Who should we blame, the parents? (No, the mother! She gets the blame for everything that goes wrong anyway.)
A rich kid coming from money (automatically, perceived to have a particular blue print) that is abusive or an addict, well, that is because they were given everything. So would that not mean the blue print would at least read generous human being? A lot of it becomes a choice.
Fortunately, some who have a good foundation grow from that, giving more than what they were given to their own family, friends and even strangers. They keep and try to teach what was good for them, build upon it with hopes to keep the momentum going. Some who had crap to start with become more than just wonderful people, but become role models for society.
Basically, if you turn out to be a shit, a person that kicks someone when there down on their luck, takes advantage of people, or bites the hand that feeds you so to speak; your lack of respect, decency, morals or ethics is on you. It is not where you came from, your people so to speak, your parents or whoever else you want to blame. It is the choices you make. You screw somebody, you know it and they know it (whether they let you know or not)! IT IS ON YOU, WHEN YOU CHOOSE TO BE A SHIT.